The Joke Is… On Who?

September 12, 2010 § Leave a comment

Sometimes I feel like my life is playing a huge prank on me.  I keep hoping that the unpleasant part of the prank is going to be over, and that friends and loved ones are going to come around the corner yelling “surprise!” and I’m going to laugh, and we’ll all joke, and all talk about how it was all just for fun..  but that moment comes all too seldom, and I feel like I am just left there in the mist of a something horrible half the time and that the situation would be funny if it were not for the fact that I feel like I’m going through it alone.

I’m know not alone in feeling this way.  I’m know I’m not special.  No one likes a mope, I know that…  But who the hell are you if you can’t relate?  I mean seriously, get over yourself.  What is so great and funny about being depressed?  Nothing!  Then why are told that we should we act like it?  Why we feel as though we have to put on a face is beyond ridiculous.  I hate it when people act as though grieving were not necessary sometimes.  Life is hard, we all know that.   Sure, you shouldn’t be bummed all the time, it’s not healthy.  Sure you should try to cheer up if you feel yourself in a depressing rut, granted, but why the hell are we so afraid to acknowledge that we all are in this world that is occasionally beautiful, and sometimes a shit-hole!?

Sometimes we are honest and sometimes we aren’t about this reality, but the point is we should really try to own our experiences; whatever they may be.  Life is hard enough as it is, it’s even harder when you can’t admit that it is.  A pain invalidated is a viral one.  That’s why I want more friends.  Friends that have lived enough and have enough experience to know what I’m getting at.  Is that too much to ask?

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